I can get with someone from Cameroon or Ivory Coast because they speak French but not a Nigerian or a Ghanaian.” I agreed with Alexi.Being a fluent English speaker who also communicated with her parents in her mother tongue, I tended to slip between languages without thinking about it.
Some responses: “Love is love.” Jennifer (23), Angolan “I would only prefer to date a Congolese man because we both understand each others cultures.
The connection is just better because we can relate in many ways since we’ve had a similar upbringing.” Sarah (24), Congolese “I love my Ghanaian brothers, especially those who can speak my tribal language. Especially when telling jokes, it just doesn’t sound the same in English.” Nana (24), Ghanaian “I will be with anyone as long as they are compatible to me and I’m attracted to them. I’m British.” Christopher (28), Nigerian “As long as they are not Jamaican.” Bijoux (28), Congolese “Dating someone from your own background has far more positives than dating someone from another background, such as cultural understanding, speaking the same language etc. I’ve brought a Nigerian, Jamaican and Congolese home.
It didn’t help when I went to their houses and the family would purposely speak in their language to exclude me, which reminded me that I wasn’t one of them. Love blinds common sense.” The idea of retiring in a country totally unfamiliar to me is quite daunting and something I know would take a lot of discussion with my future partner, if he happened to have a different country of origin.
It was for this reason that I began to look for like-minded guys who were also from my own culture, guys I could relate to. I know my family would be pleased if I brought home a Congolese man, but what if I do so to my own detriment? Having to decide which culture my children followed more or which one was dominant in my household is another consideration, as I find it important for reasons of identity.
Outside our homes, we spoke the same street language, ate the same type of food, listened to the same type of music and were attracted to the same type of guys (or girls).